once again, saturday night live is back from hiatus - it seems like they're on hiatus every 2 weeks - and they're back with some creative resurgence (like every time). jennifer lopez pulled double duty as host and musical guest, even though she just parted ways with her record label and her album release has been delayed. the episode was mostly a hit, with a few misses. here are the highlights.
the episode started with a "we are the world" parody. it was just alright. like most skits, kristen wiig was the highlight as gwen stefani. j.lo did her best rihanna impression and, well, it wasn't all that great.
my favorite skit from the night was a telemundo parody about the olympics. j. lo does her best comedic acting when falling into hispanic stereotypes. go figure.
my favorite new snl character - tinatina - came back for another go around of homemade inventions. this time it was car horns. lopez joined in on the fun as tinatina's cousin.
miley cyrus may have just one-upped herself in the category of doing things inappropriate for her age. the disney star has recorded a duet with vh1's hot ticket bret michaels. the over-40 rocker's "nothing to lose" features the underaged cyrus. as far as i can tell, the song is about falling for someone and then getting busy with them. real cool. no one at disney caught this? really? way to protect your talent. while this won't damage miley's career, it might tarnish her reputation. who wants to be acquainted with a washed-up rock star looking for love in an std-infested tour bus? not me. it's understandable that the duo's voices compliment each other (they're both husky and don't have much range), but couldn't there have been a father/daughter message or something? oh well. better luck picking projects next times, miles. ugh.
jessica simpson has been traveling the world for close to a year now finding out what beauty means in other countries. the show, the price of beauty, is set to debut next month on vh1 and the promo has just dropped. check it out above. it looks like jessica may be able to remind america that she's likable and teach us all a lesson in the process. the fact that she brought her two well-known side kicks, ken paves and cacee cobb, only increases the appeal of the show for me. i just want to get those john mayer "sexual napalm" thoughts out of my head.
when whitney houston announced her "comeback" i knew nothing good could come from it. the problem isn't whitney releasing new music ("million dollar bill" is a guilty pleasure for me). it's the fact that when an album is released, a tour is expected. on tour, your voice can't be autotuned and fixed the way it sounds on the record. so, for a former crack addict like whitney, nothing good could come. houston kicked off her comeback tour in australia this week and things aren't going well, much like i predicted they wouldn't. yes, her album can sell millions. but, when people go to a concert, they expect to hear the whitney they know. her high notes of the "i will always love you days" are long gone and she just doesn't have the stamina to perform anymore. when she was "tired" after oprah, i said ok. but, being "tired" or "over worked" has been her excuse for ever major performance since the comeback. check out the painful performance of "i will always love you" that caused concert goers to leave the show early above. the fact that her concert promoter's excuse was that "if you want to hear whitney from the 90s, buy a cd." no, sir. people's talent shouldn't be contingent on the decade. they should stand the test of time. 1990s celine dion sounds just like today's celine. way to ruin a good thing, whitney.
rose nylund is heading to 30 rock! the golden girls funny lady has finally landed a hosting gig after an internet campaign started earlier this year to get her on the show. white is said to be signing this week to host a "ladies of comedy" episode alongside ex-snler's molly shannon, tina fey and amy poehler. it should be an snl to remember. if they somehow mess this up, snl is dead to me. dead. ok, not dead. just on the shit list. expect the episode to tape and air sometime in late march or early april ... in other casting news, the most wanted actress of pilot season - becki newton - has committed to a new show. the ugly better scene steeler reportedly got 11 offers for new shows after abc announced ugly betty was in its final season. newton has signed on to love bites, a romantic hour-long comedy that will follow the lives of three interconnected relationships. newton will be playing the role of annie, a hopeless romantic and a virgin. yep, sounds like quite the character. i hope the show turns out better than it sounds, because it kind of sounds to conceptual for tv. but, it is from a former sex and the city writer so it can't be too bad. if the show doesn't get picked up, i'm sure newton will get snapped up as a recast in another show.
tiger woods held a press conference this morning to apologize for his ... indiscretions? needless to say, it wasn't that great. first and foremost, it's been three months since thanksgiving when the "incident" happened. three months! how has this been news this long first of all? second of all, what took so long? the speech, which you can watch above, was super rehearsed and i highly doubt he wrote it himself. it came off really insincere, which was not his intention - he blamed fame and money for his problems. boo hoo. i'm just glad his wife, elin, didn't show up. it's always the worst when you see the wives standing behind their husbands. tiger's mom, on the other hand, was there to support him. they had an awkward, forced hug at the end. it was like at a wedding when you don't really know the bride and groom but they still want to hug you. he also said "a lot of people don't know this, but i was raised buddhist." ok, that's relevant because? oh, tiger. woods is set to head back into sex rehab and will most likely make his golf re-debut later this year. won't that be fun. i hope one of his mistresses gets a job reporting for the golf network.
it's no secret that i'm pretty much obsessed with the real housewives franchise. who wouldn't be? crazy women with tons of money doing stupid things? that's an a+ tv show. the women of new york come back in just a couple weeks and the full length promo for this season has hit the internets. it looks like we might have the season to top new jersey. there's a new housewife - some bizarre looking woman named sonja - and a lot of fighting. like a lot a lot. check it out for yourself.
this year, the month of april holds the return of two of my favorite things: my birthday and glee. entertainment tonight ran a trailer for the new episodes the other night and they look hilarious. check out sue sylvester in a cone bra. and brittany gets more lines!
as we begin new episodes of our favorite shows this season, we all start to wonder what will be back next season. well, i've found a handy dandy list that may calm - or heighten - your fears. the ausiello files are my favorite part of entertainment weekly's website (the author, michael ausiello, is by far the biggest tv spoiler and made the jump from tv guide to ew a couple years ago). here's the link to ausiello's guesses of whether your favorite shows will be back for sure, maybe or definitely now. his predictions are almost always right.
russel brand has landed himself a movie. the british funnyman is starring in get him to the greek, a loose sequel to 2008's forgetting sarah marshall. brand reprises his role of a recovered alcoholic rock star, this time getting ready to relaunch his music career. jonah hill returns for the film, though i'm not sure he's playing the same character. i mean hill plays the same role in every film, just not necessarily the same character. check out the trailer for the flick above, especially the amount that features diddy. yes, diddy. i'm guessing every scene he's in is featured in the clip.
one of my favorite shows just got better. fox hit glee has just added former snl-er molly shannon to its list of recurring characters. shannon, who has had at least 2 sitcom flops since leaving the sketch show, is one of the funniest women out there. i just think she hasn't been utilized to her full potential. but, now, i know she will be. molly will be joining glee for one episode with the option to recur as brenda castle, a new astronomy teacher at mckinley high. castle will become a new rival for jane lynch's sue sylvester, which is sure to ensure a lot, a lot of comedy. shannon's character is described as a 45-year-old pill-popping alcoholic who will also coach the school's badminton team. this part is just begging for physical comedy. i loved shannon the american kath and kim and can't wait her to debut at the end of this season when glee returns in april. rumor also has it that jennifer lopez and neil patrick harris are on set this week filming an episode. this show will just get better and better.
apparently. the grey's anatomy actress has snagged the lead in one for the money, the first movie in a potential series about a fashion buyer-turned-bounty hunter based on the stephanie plum book series by janey evanovich. reese witherspoon was originally attached to star in the series when it was developed in the legally blonde days, but dropped out when the project kept stalling. lucky for heigl. while i don't think katherine has the charm and presence as reese, i think she's a better fit for a role like this. if one for the money does well at the box office there is potential for 15 more films - yep, 15! the 16th book hits shelves later this year. if the rumors that katherine will finally be let out of her grey's anatomy contract at the end of this season are true, then she's going to need some steady work. katherine currently has two romantic comedies out for release this year - killers opposite ashton kutcher and life as we know it with josh duhamel. this role is also set to be the first that pays katherine for her box office pull -her last film, the ugly truth, made more than $200 million worldwide, which equals a double-digit pay day.
just a thought...
i really like kirstie alley. i know she's abrasive and sometimes labeled "crazy," but she's honest. her new show, kirstie alley's big life, is set to debut on a&e march 21st and the trailer just dropped online. i like that she says she doesn't embrace being "full figured" or flaunt her fat. i don't really think anyone enjoys being fat all the time. and i don't think being "fabulous and thick" should be touted as a healthy lifestyle. if you're ok with your body image, then good for you. but let's be real here - being obese has never and will never be healthy. that's why i like kirstie. she's willing to show people who have probably just accepted that they're fat and think that they're ok with it that it's hard work, but doable, to change. well, hopefully. she hasn't finished filming the show yet and who knows if its working. i'm not saying everyone has to be a skinny minnie (definitely not), but everyone has a healthy weight range and we shouldn't ignore that. i know i'll be tuning in to see kirstie's journey (the most overused word in reality show weight loss). well if i can figure out which channel a&e even is.
yesterday the saints came marching in to take home a super bowl victory. too bad the same can't be said for the ads. the super bowl is the most coveted tv event in terms of advertising and companies usually shell out big bucks to get their latest and greatest featured during the game. this year, the companies fell short. i really don't think there was a standout commercial that will still be playing a year from now. here are my picks for some of the better ones.
here's a couple updates on what may be happening on some of tv's top series. that's right, they're just rumors (well, some are confirmed) but they're big ones. first up? abc's brothers and sisters. this show has always performed strongly in the ratings, but some big changes may be ahead for the show. it's been confirmed that the current season will be star rob lowe's last. apparently lowe felt he was being under utilized on the series and could get more elsewhere. ok, well you're on an ensemble drama - story arcs come and go, you would have been used sometime later on! the other reason for lowe's exit is reportedly that on-screen wife calista flockhart has asked the creative team behind b&s to cut back her hours next season, hopefully from 3-4 days a week to only 1 or 2. now where can i get that gig? producers supposedly turned down flockhart's request as her story line next season is set to be lesser anyway, requiring her to work less without altering her contract. flockhart and lowe's characters will allegedly divorce by season's end after kitty's (calista) recovery from cancer. lowe has reportedly been in negotiations to head up the cast of the criminal minds spin-off set to launch next fall on cbs. the other big rumor surrounding this abc drama is that there will be a complete cast overhaul. well, only technically. the cast will be reintroduced as younger versions of themselves in a multi-episode flashback. the alphabet net is tapping some pretty big starts to fill the roles of the walker family. the biggest? joe jonas. the already-under-contract disney star is set to play a younger version of balthazar getty, who will be returning to the dramedy later this season.
other big names included in the recast include kay panabaker (another sometimes-disney star who was recently featured in the fame remake) as a younger version of flockhart and rachel leigh cook (she's all that - yeah, she's still working!) as matriarch sally field. this should be interesting. it really just seems like a spring sweeps rating attempt, but i'm guessing it will pay off ... now for some fast castings. virginia madsen has signed on to play the head of a family of small town criminals for abc's scoundrels. the show will focus on the family's attempt to go straight after the death of their father ... sarah chalke (scrubs) is returning to abc as the star of freshmen, about three newbie politicians trying to balance their new high powered careers and relationships in d.c. should be good as it comes from one half of the creative force behind how i met your mother, another show chalke has worked on. they're still waiting to cast the two male leads of the series.
two very different award shows released their nominations yesterday and today, with some cross over. the razzies, the anti-oscars that recognize failures in film, and the oscars both released their lists of nominees, with names like sandra bullock appearing on both lists (though not for the same role). here's the list of razzie nominees and oscar nominees, and who i think will take home the statues (only for the oscars - everyone nominated deserves a razzie equally). i just hope someone pulls a halle berry and actually shows up at the razzie ceremony to collect his or her statue.
razzie nominees
worst picture of 2009
all about steve
g.i. joe: the rise of cobra
old dogs
land of the lost
transformers: revenge of the fallen
worst actor of 2009
the jonas brothers, the jonas brothers 3d concert experience
will ferrell, land of the lost
steve martin, pink panther 2
eddie murphy, imagine that
john travolta, old dogs
worst actress of 2009
beyonce, obsessed
sandra bullock, all about steve
miley cyrus, hannah montana: the movie
megan fox, jennifer's body and transformers 2
sarah jessica parker, did you hear about the morgans?
worst screen couple of 2009
any two jonas brothers, the jonas brothers 3d concert experience
sandra bullock and bradley cooper, all about steve
will ferrell and any co-star, land of the lost
shia lebouf and megan fox and/or any transformer, transformers 2
kristen stewart and robert pattinson or taylor lautner, new moon
worst supporting actress of 2009
candice bergen, bride wars
ali larter, obsessed
sienna miller, g.i. joe
kelly preston, old dogs
julie white, transformers 2
worst supporting actor of 2009
billy ray cyrus, hannah montana: the movie
hugh hefner (as himself), miss march
robert pattinson, new moon
jorma taccone, land of the lost
marlon wayans, g.i. joe
worst remake, rip-off or sequel
g.i. joe and the rise of cobra
land of the lost
pink panther 2
transformers: revenge of the fallen
new moon
the razzies also included nominees for worst of the decade - here's my picks for those categories
worst picture of the decade - gigli
worst actor of the decade -rob schneider
worst actress of the decade - madonna
the oscar nominees
best motion picture of the year
avatar*
the blind side
district 9
an education
the hurt locker
inglorious basterds
precious
a serious man
up
up in the air
avatar will definitely take home the prize, but the extended list of nominees makes this an interesting race. surprises like the blind side, district 9 and up show that the academy is beginning to take note of films made beyond the typical vein of oscar nominees.
performance by an actor in a leading role
jeff bridges, crazy heart*
george clooney, up in the air
colin firth, a single man
morgan freeman, invictus
jeremy renner, the hurt locker
bridges has swept the award show circuit up until now, so i expect him to take the little gold man home. the two surprises in this category, for me at least, are colin firth and morgan freeman. both of these movies have been getting a lot of praise, but the individual performances haven't really been talked about. the fact that freeman made the transformation into nelson mandella could lead the academy to give him the statue.
performance by an actress in a leading role
sandra bullock, the blind side*
helen mirren, the last station
carey mulligan, an education
gabourey sidibe, precious
meryl streep, julie and julia
sandra bullock has, like jeff bridges, been getting the award show statues this year and i don't see anyone standing in the way of bullock's streak. if she doesn't win this oscar, i really think it will be the biggest upset of the year. bullock did a subtle transformation for her role, something that is well received usually by the academy. but, sometimes, they want a complete metamorphosis, like streep into julia child.
best performance by an actor in a supporting role
matt damon, invictus
woody harrelson, the messenger
christopher plummer, the last station
stanley tucci, the lovely bones
christoph waltz,inglorious basterds*
another person who has swept this category this year. while i haven't seen the movie yet (though it's supposedly on its way from netflix), i won't mess with his success - and i don't think any of the other nominated performances will either.
best performance by an actress in a supporting role
penelope cruz, nine
verra farmiga, up in the air
maggie gyllenhaal, crazy heart
anna kendrick, up in the air
mo'nique, precious*
while farmiga and kendrick are awesome in up in the air, no one can touch mo'nique in precious. the academy loves comedians in dramatic roles and mo'nique has walked away with all the other major statues this year.
that's it for the big categories. i'll be checking my predictions on march 7th on abc, will you?
last night, cbs aired the 52nd annual grammy awards and they were no disappointment. while the show is supposed to be about the awards, it was really the performances that made the special, well, special. lady gaga opened the show in true lady gaga fashion, including surprise guest elton john. it was over the top and theatrical, just the way to kick off an awards show. people say they're getting tired of gaga and her theatrics, but had the opening number been a bland stand-there-and-play-guitar type thing, the night wouldn't have gotten off on the right foot.
after gaga, everyone from pink to beyonce and bon jovi took the stage. pink's number, "glitter in the air," was proof that lip synching is dead. dead dead dead. if pink can do aerial stunts and sing live, anyone can. sorry, britney, but you're going to have to get your voice together.
speaking of britney, she was nominated for best dance recording for "womanizer." not surprisingly, she didn't win. but she did show up - after an 8 year hiatus from the show - in a crazy fishnet dress. i think it's pretty obvious why she skipped any press before the show.
beyonce was another great performance, though it was disappointing she didn't sing the song that made her year what it was - "single ladies." miss knowles did, however, cover alanis morisette's "you should know." it's weird to think about beyonce singing about uncle joey from full house (that's who the song was - allegedly - originally written about, fyi), but whatever.
taylor swift, who took home four of the night's big awards, performed on stage with fleetwood mac legend stevie nicks and, well, it was less than impressive. i've said it before and i'll say it again. and again - taylor has an issue singing live. it's usually better when she has the guitar in front of her, but last night it was just flat. flat flat flat. the one thing that saves taylor is that she's a good song writer, which is sure to keep her foot in the door of the industry for the rest of her life. she just needs to start focusing on more adult material and not sing every single song about puppy love and fairytales. the girl turns 21 this year, come on. it didn't help that taylor's breathy voice was backed up with stevie's husky one. it was just kind of a mess. the one plus was that the duo sang one of my faves from stevie's fleetwood days, "rhiannon." why stevie played the tambourine randomly during the performance is beyond me.
the most star-powered number of the night came during the michael jackson tribute, the final imagining of his "earth song" performance form what was to be the "this is it" concert series. the thing that annoyed me most about this performance was that it was in 3d - i know i wasn't the only one not to get the memo about needing glasses. hello, grammy people, not everyone just has those lying around. had they sent them out in the mail or in tv guide, i could understand it. but the award show expected people to go to target or kmart and pick up a pair. why is this '80s technology back with such full force? it's not like they've improved on it or like it's actually there in front of you. 2d is just fine by me. the "earth song" performance featured celine dion (surprisingly tame), usher, carrie underwood, jennifer hudson and smokey robinson. i understand this was michael's favorite song from "this is it," but i would have much preferred a medley of his hit songs.
after the performance, michael's son, prince, and daughter, paris, accepted the lifetime achievement award for their father. for some reason, they were joined on stage by their cousins (there's no question in my mind that this wasn't some way to promote the cousins' fame) but not little brother blanket. where the hell was blanket? prince gave most of the speech and the way he spoke was almost identical to the intonations and inflections in his father's voice. it was almost creepy.
the worst performance of the night has to go to jamie foxx, who didn't seem able to keep up with his backing track for "blame it." the fact that the song is so autotuned made it even harder. watch with your own discretion - let me warn you that the performance starts out with a hokey opera skit.
now to the night's winners and what i think of them.
album of the year: taylor swift, fearless - while it was a huge hit, i don't know that fearless made enough advances or impact in the history of music. i'm not saying taylor isn't deserving - she works hard and have made people pay attention to country music again - but lady gaga had the most hits and innovation of any other artists. the biggest disappointment is that gaga was shutout of the best new artist category because of a single nomination in the dance/electronica category next year.
song of the year: "single ladies," beyonce - deserved, deserved, deserved.
best new artist: zac brown band - did i call it or what? there really wasn't much else to choose from this year so the country group who writes their own stuff was the top pick.
pop vocal album: the black eyed peas, the e.n.d. - surprising, but their innovation makes it worth it. the peas are another group that can't really perform live. here's their performance.
best pop vocal performance (female): beyonce, "halo" - duh.
best pop vocal performance (male): jason mraz, "make it mine" - must have been slim pickings
pop collaboration with vocals: jason mraz and colbie caillat, "lucky" - colbie may have been the nights most surprising winner because she won on others' coattails. she helped write and sing on taylor's record, garnering herself a grammy for record of the year.
i'm not going to go into all the other categories, but just know that gaga wasn't completely shut out - she won the 2 awards in the dance category: one for "poker face" and the other for her album, the fame. other winners included beyonce in the r&b category, tswift in country, kings of leon and green day (who previewed their broadway musical, american idiot, at the show) in the rock category and jay-z, rihanna and kanye in the rap category for "run this town."
and, because you read this whole, long blog, a treat: my favorite picture from the night, ke$ha and justin bieber. she could eat him.
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